


Distance

by TheGracefulBrownGazelle



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Anal Sex, Canon Divergence at Chapter 4, M/M, Multi, OCC - Freeform, Panic Attacks, Selectively Mute Souda, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-04
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2019-02-10 11:13:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12910731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGracefulBrownGazelle/pseuds/TheGracefulBrownGazelle
Summary: He knew how annoying and invasive he was. He didn't make much of an impact with his friends, which is why he is willing to give up his life to keep his friends from starving to death. He successfully kills himself, but he still wakes up in the hospital. Why?





	1. The Death

**Author's Note:**

> This will be dark and I'm really sorry with how many changes I made, I just put a bit of my thoughts into this, as a way to help myself.

He knew. He knew how annoying and invasive he is. He knows how aggressive he can get, but he can't help it.

It keeps people away. Keeps himself from being betrayed by the so called people who called them his friend. He has been betrayed too much. Which is why he is so disappointed in himself because he let himself get to close to one Hajime Hinata, who could and could not be the traitor. He could see the flick of pain in those hazel eyes every time he purposefully distanced himself from the boy.

It wasn't like Hajime truly cared about him. He always saw the annoyance in Hajime's eyes whenever he called his name; the roll of his eyes whenever he mentions his interests and Miss Sonia; even the sigh from his mouth whenever he makes a suggestion.

He was stupid. He was paranoid. And he was non-existent.

He wasn't smart like Mahiru or Togami, he wasn't mysterious like Peko or Gundam, tough like Fuyuhiko, Akane, and Nekomaru, not was he graceful like Sonia and Hiyoko. He wasn't even odd like Ibuki or Nagito and social like Teruteru. He wasn't even kind like Chiaki and Mikan.

He was cruel. He knew how annoying he was to Sonia and the others, yet he made no effort to stop. He knew that targeting Gundam was pointless because he and Sonia were nothing but close friends, but it kept him from the breeder from wanting to get to know him.

That's why when it was announced that they couldn't leave this disorienting fun house until someone was dead, he was willing to do whatever he could to protect them. His friends. Or at least that's what he thought they were to him, even when they thought he was a nuisance.

After the fourth day, he could see the exhaustion seeping through his friends' body and he hated seeing his eccentric friends becoming dull with starvation, so he decided; his plan would begin tonight. He locked himself into his room, finding some bright papers and a bright pen to match and used all of the papers in his room to write some messages and hid them within his tracksuit.

It was 5 in the morning, according to the clock, when he left his room and traveled to the Final Dead Room. He entered and cleared the test with some difficulty and figured out the secret of the fun house. It didn't matter to him as he grabbed some rope and an elephant tranquilizer.

When he came back into his room, he tied the rope onto one of the television beams and created a noose. A very typical suicide but he wasn't all that creative when it didn't have to electronics and automobiles. He tied the noose to his neck and dropped himself onto the floor, the noose tightning and squeezing the air from his body. He could feel the blood rushing from his head and he couldn't breathe.

He wanted to live. But why? He had nothing to live for anymore. What was the point of living when he had nothing but an abusive father to go home to and dying from the hands of a friend who found him too annoying.

Don't loose hope.

Where did it come from? And why now? He let himself up and rapidly untied himself from the rope desperately grasping his throat and gulping as much air his lungs could carry.

He failed. He couldn't even kill himself and the despair was eating at him. He left his room, throat still clutched in his small hands and sprints to the Strawberry Tower, where he screams his already sore throat raw and cries. He takes the elephant tranquilizer from his pocket and jams it into his leg.

It moves through his body slowly and he can feel his body collapse with exhaustion and Souda allows it to happen. Before his eyes close, he hears a shout from a deep voice yell "NO!" before the darkness took him away.

And then he wakes up in one of the third island's hospital bed.


	2. No Response

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Souda wakes up and the crew visit him.

When his pink eyes snapped open, he closed them as fast as possible as it felt like he was starring to long at the sun. When his eyes adjust, he attempts to sit up, only for it to feel like a swordsman has stabbed him a million times in his body. Souda could care less, he ignores the pain and sits up.

He can feel the panic settling into his body and he can't help but to shoot out from the hospital body, only to collapse onto the floor. He couldn't help but cry. He failed to kill himself. Again. He couldn't protect his friends and they were probably dead. He didn't even get to apologize to them for failing them. They were probably execution in brutal fashion like those in the class trials.

He hears a sound somewhere within the room but his sight is too blurred by his tears and his panic blocks his other senses. All of a sudden, he is lifted from the floor and put back onto the bed. His sobs stop as he looks up to see Mechamaru staring at him, his eyes glowing with concern. He pink eyes glance behind his fellow classmate to see everyone except Gundham and Sonia, all of them watching him with tears gleaming in their eyes.

"Souda," he hears Hajime whisper.

He looks away, too scared to see the disappointment in his friends' eyes when they realized that he couldn't do things right. He stares blankly at the window, ignoring all questions and calls of his name.

He feels someone roughly grab his shoulder and he meets the furious but concerned eyes of Fuyuhiko. Fuyuhiko grabs him and shakes him so hard, his head feels like it would fall off sooner.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?! Why did you do that to yourself?! Are you fucking stupid?! We could have handled it! FUCKING ANSWER ME!"

He flinches at the yell and Chiaki seems to have noticed as she grabbed Fuyuhiko's shoulder and shakes her head softly at him. He looks at her and sighs before turning back to Souda, who was surprised at the long stream of tears flowing down his baby face.

"I thought........I thought that.......Was Peko's sacrifice not enough?.........I thought she gave her life for everyone else's, even if it was mostly for me........I can't....I can't let you give up your life when so many people gave their lives and their bodies for us........please tell us........ tell me why you did it."

The room is silent as they wait for a response but they realize soon that they weren't going to get one soon. The lack of response didn't matter to Fuyuhiko, as he climbed on the bed and wrapped his arms around Souda while resting his head on the pinkette's chest. They didn't expect Souda to respond and hug back, both boys sobbing and holding on as tight as possible.

"We love you idiot. I know we didn't make it seem like it before, but we really do."

Fuyuhiko didn't expect a response from the silent boy, so instead, he held him tighter. The others watch with concern. The door opens again and Souda watches Sonia and Gundham walk in. He sees the redness in Sonia's eyes and the frown in Gundham's firm lips.

"Souda," Sonia whispers.

The panic resurfaces and he jumps away from Fuyuhiko's arms and begins breathing heavily. He can't breathe, he can't bear the disappointment and the annoyance he'll see in her eyes.

"What's happening," Gundham's deep voice demands.

Fuyuhiko sneers, "you all need to leave. All of you. I can look out for him."

"But-" Hajime and Sonia say before they were cut off by the smaller man again.

"I got this. I understand what he feels, somewhat. It's not like any of you cared before this. I haven't either and this is my way to repay my cruelty. Leave."

Gundham opens his mouth but closes it when Fuyuhiko throws him the nastiest glare he could. So they left, but not without everyone glancing at the pinkette. They all whisper their goodbyes and the door closes. When it closes, the blonde boy turns back to Souda.

"I'm sorry, Souda."

Souda stares back before opening his arms and closed them once the smaller boy crawledinto them. Together, they cried their eyes out, something they couldn't really do after everything. Fuyuhiko cried for the loss of Peko, his best friend and the love of his life. Souda cried for being a failure and not good enough.

Souda never wanted to get to close to someone, but this wasn't too bad. He hopes the smaller boy want get too annoyed by him.

Fuyuhiko asks Souda some questions but he gets no response. he doesn't mind since Souda didn't make him leave and instead they fell asleep together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love the idea of Souda and Fuyuhiko being really close. There will be nothing romantic, just them giving each other the comfort they need.


	3. Arrival

After hours of peaceful sleeping, Souda awakens to the sound to Fuyuhiko's panicked scream, which has Souda opening his eyes rapidly to figure out what happned.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" the smaller man shouts.

Souda follows Fuyuhiko's suprised gazes and spots Monokuma smiling at him from the foot of his bed. He nearly punches Fuyuhiko, who dodges the punch with ease.

"The hell are you doing here?" Fuyuhiko asks, a frown scrunching his small face.

The bear puts his tiny hands to his face and begins laughing, "Phuhuhu. Just here to see the survivor."

"Well you saw him, now leave."

The slightly innocent laugh Monokuma gives evolves into an angry chuckle. The small bear holds up his right hand, his claws out and his face red in anger, "do not piss me off, baby gangster, I could end you for breaking the rules in this hospital. Be grateful I decided to to leave you alone as well as saving your now 'precious friend'."

The last part makes Souda freeze and tilt his head in confusion, which Monokuma notices the movement and smiles at the confused boy.

"That's right, Pinky. I saved your life. As much as I wanted to see a killing, a suicide is too boring for this game, trust me. You really done some damage on your throat since your vocal cords are all kinds of messed up from that serious hanging. I was considering leaving you to die from the tranquilizer, but your friends, especially the animal weirdo and this shorty here were very passionate about keeping you alive, so I decided to do them all a favor. You're welcome!"

Souda looks to Fuyuhiko for confirmation, who nods and lowers his head to hide the pink glow of his cheeks. Well, pinker glow.

"Oh yeah!" Monokuma shouts randomly, making the two boys jump, "I wanted to give you this."

He hands out a bigger tablet similar to the e-handbook that was handed to him at the beginning of the killing game it also had a stylus with it

"Decided to make a new tablet, called the Monopad, since you won't be able to speak much if you wanted to. You use this to write. There. Aren't I generous! A-bye-bye now!"

Monokuma throws the boys a cocky smile before disappearing from their sight. The silence was awkward but it gave plenty of time for Souda to think to himself for some time. Souda wrote on his new Monopad asking his first question since he woke up.

_How did I live?_

The question makes Fuyuhiko freeze for a few seconds before shaking off with a sigh. "I'm not really sure. No one is. Your heart did stop for a while but Gundham gave you CPR when you weren't breathing. Everyone panicked and then Monokuma came in with his stupid ambulance truck and carrying you away. We were confused when we weren't told to go to the trail room, we were just lead back into out rooms by Monomi. We spent all night worrying about you and trying to figure out what happened."

_How long have I been asleep?_

"It's been over two weeks."

Souda's eyes widen and he feels guilty for making his classmates feel so worried on his behalf. Almost as if Fuyuhiko can read his mind, the smaller blonde throws his arms around the pinkette and squeezes tight, "don't think like that. You're a good person and a good friend and I'm sorry for how I treated you, you must have been as scared as I was after realizing the traitor is still here."

They continue to embrace until the door opens and the two separate. When they look at the door, Hajime is there, holding out an old handheld gaming system with a small smile. Chiaki and Nagito follow, both looking at Souda with curious and concerned eyes. Not much happens as the three hands the game to Souda, giving a smile and wishing for him to get better before leaving the room.

Fuyuhiko looks at the pinkette for his response and beams at the small smile upon his face. The moment is ruined when the smile is replaced by a faced filled with anxiety, his lips in a firm line. The door opened and Gundham and Sonia file in, both holding flowers and smiling nervously.

Fuyuhiko hopes he doesn't have to kick anyone out of this room again.


	4. Take A Good Look

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gundam takes a good look at Souda and Fuyuhiko nearly pisses himself with anger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't updated in a while. I'll try to do so more often but my chapters will not be the longest.

Fuyuhiko gives Gundam and Sonia a withering glare as the pair enters with room with flowers. The hand he is holding is shaking violently, the fingers grasping his hands so tight, he is slowly loosing the feeling of his fingers.

"What do you want now."

Sonia clears her throat before speaking, "Hajime said that he, Nagito, and Chiaki visited Souda and I thought that I could give him some flowers to wish him better."

"Why?"

Sonia is flabbergasted at the question and stutters for a few seconds before finding the right words, "we were worried for Souda."

There is a booming laugh and it was surprising that it didn't come from the Dark Overlord Gundam himself, it was from Fuyuhiko, and even Souda couldn't help but be shocked at the sound coming from the small man. And the next words from his mouth made him freeze.

"Worried? That's fucking funny as just before this incident, you treated Souda like he didn't exist. You ignored him and avoided him and treated him like a piece of shit and now that he nearly died, you care?! I may have not been the best to him either, but I never dragged him through the dirt like you have. If you found him to be nosy and too hyper, you could have told him to stop. You may be a princess but I won't let you treat him like some peasant that's below him. You don't realize how much we've all hurt him when he's just been trying to live a normal life here. Just look at him!"

While Sonia looks down at the floor in shame, Gundam actually looks and the pinkette. His hair has lost it's shine and is just limp on his head when it once was wild and vibrant. His then radiant eyes are now a dull pink and the mouth that could never keep itself closed was finally closed and and was hard to tell of it was ever going to open again. His once slightly tanned skin was now a pale gray that was a dark contrast from his hair and eyes. There was also something that Gundam noticed on him that he hadn't ever noticed on the man.

The inside of his wrists were littered with at least 10 lines on each wrist. Scars, Gundam concludes. They looked old and were hardly noticeable before but his gray skin made the scars apparent. But the question was, who did it? And it didn't take much time to figure out who. When his eyes connect to Souda's pink eyes, the pinkette moves his arms at lightning speed to hide his inner arms. Before he moved him, Gundam noticed something else, circular scars were on his arms, not a lot, but a look at two of them and Gundam recognized them as cigarette burns and Gundam feels something inside him shift uneasily.

His attention was shifted immediately when Fuyuhiko's voice was cracking with anger and sorrow.

"None of us cared until he nearly died, and if that doesn't tell you how shitty we are as his so called 'friends,' then there is something wrong with us. We were all supposed to be friends and help each other and now we can't even trust each other and one of us tried to kill ourselves because we didn't make him feel loved or safe. And I'm going to do everything I can to make him now how much I love and care for him. And I'm not going to let you hurt him again, so you can get the fuck out of here and take your shitty flowers with you."

Sonia is about to object to the order, but a hand on her shoulder stops her from doing so. She looks up at Gundam and he nods at her, it's time to leave. Sonia sniffs and nearly runs out the door and as Gundam is about to leave the room, he turns around and looks at Souda one more time. The other looks back and the concerned look in those multicolored eyes makes Souda's heart beat faster.

Suddenly Gundam throws something Souda's way, who catches it with mild confusion. Souda looks down at the item in his hands and smiles.

It was his hat.

When he looks up, Gundam nods at him with a small smirk before turning around and leaving the room.

When the door closes, Souda holds the hat close to his chest and breathing the familiar scent of oil and metal from his hat. There is a sweeter smell mixed in with his hat, cinnamon, Souda guess and the smell is relaxing.

Fuyuhiko watched the interaction with calculating eyes before shrugging and moving back to the bed. Before he joins his friend on the bed, he looks down and shouts.

"WHAT THE FUCK!"

Souda is startled and looks where the blonde man is looking and is shocked as well.

It was one of the Dark Devas of Destruction sleeping on his bed.

How the hell did he get there?


	5. Finally Home?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Souda finally moves back into his hut but it feels just as empty as it was before.

It took several hours for Souda and Fuyuhiko to realize that the Deva didn't want to move away from Souda. With every suggestion they offer the hamster to go back to Gundam, it would chatter furiously and bite the finger of whoever was closest.

"Okay, god dammit, you can stay."

The angry chatters stop and the hamster, who was currently sitting on Souda's lap looks up at them. In a way, the small hamster looked smug as it stared the two humans in the eyes and then it lays its body down to go to sleep.

"Little shit," Fuyuhiko mutters. Souda smiles. Once again their moment is ruined when there is a loud pop and Monokuma is right in front of them.

"What now?"

Monokuma lets out a short, threatening growl before clearing his throat and speaking, "it's about damn time that you two get the hell out of my hospital. Go back to your huts or something and fuck, at least give a innocent bear like me a warning before you let go of your urge to mate."

"Wait," Fuyuhiko interrupts, "Souda can go back to his hut now?"

"Well he's awake and fully functional. I think. So yeah! Get out!"

And Monokuma poofs away, leaving the two boys alone with each other. Fuyuhiko, who was excited at the thought of Souda returning back with them, stills at the frightened gleam in the pinkette's eyes.

"You okay?"

Souda snaps from his thoughts, eyebrows furrow before grabbing the MonoPad to write on it.

_I don't know if I'm ready._

Fuyuhiko rubs the pale pink hair in his sight and gives him a tight hug, "I'll be there with you, ever step of the way. We should get ready to leave before Monokuma punishes us for breaking more of his rules."

Fuyuhiko gets up from the bed and goes around the other side to help Souda, who struggled terribly to remove himself from the tiny bed. Once Souda's feet hit the ground, he immediately looses his footing and just as Fuyuhiko said, he was right there to catch him. The thought of someone being there for him make Souda's heart warm. Fuyuhiko helps Souda get changed in his usual clothes, not mentioning the many scars on his arms and torso, which made Souda grateful. Before leaving the hospital, they make sure that the cranky hamster was secured in Souda's pocket. Together the pair leaves the hospital and a small shiver runs down Souda's spine as he looks back at the Titty Typhoon music lobby where two of his friends were murdered in cold blood by someone they once trusted. Suddenly, a lot of memories overtook him.

The body under the table.

A classmate getting fried.

Someone loosing their mind and is currently fucking with everyone.

A girl leaning on the door.

A friendship ruined by death.

A friend hanging.

A throat slit.

And himself, needled.

And all of a sudden, he finds himself at the front door of his hut, body shaking when Fuyuhiko opens the door. His room was left the exact same way as it was before everything went to shit in the fun house; tools littered everywhere around the floor and his clothes thrown carelessly around the room. Random inventions were laid in random areas of his room.

The smell of his room was once comforting but now it's a harsh reality that he is still alive after trying to end his life, and it chills him to the bone. When he feels Fuyuhiko away, Souda grips tighter, and turns to face the smaller man, who is frightened at the wild look in Souda's eyes.

"I'll be right back, I promise. I'm just going to tell Gundam where his other hamster is since it won't be leaving you any time soon. I'll be back in two minutes."

Fuyuhiko gives another tight squeeze before Souda reluctantly lets go and watches the blonde boy walk to another hut and knock on the door. The door opens slowly and Souda spots Gundam's shining earring before spotting the man himself. He man looks exhausted but looks relieved as Fuyuhiko continues to speak to him. Those unique eyes suddenly meet his and Souda jumps before quickly entering his own hut. He doesn't shut the door because the moment he looks into the room, the feeling of ice water on his skin is back and with a vengeance.

Then there is a streak of heat on the left side of his face.

And then another streak on the right.

When Souda touches his face, he looks at the substance on his fingers: tears.

And the dam bursts again.

Souda gets on his knees and the crushing feeling flattens him until he is sobbing, holding his face as his body is in a tight ball on the floor. He has never felt so cold in his life.

Not even when his life was being sucked away not too long ago.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this first chapter, despite how depressing it is. It will get happier but with some time.


End file.
